Halloween 2009

Friends and family came to our house for Halloween this year. With all the success of the recent block party I expected our street to be a bit livelier than it ended up being. Regardless, a good time was had by all (even me). The neighboring streets made up for the malaise of festivities on our street. The kids had a great time-even Georgia who wasn’t quite sure what was going on however it didn’t matter because there was an endless supply mini-bags of M&Ms for her to devour on a continual basis.


Giving Is Better Than Receiving

One of the most exciting part of Parker’s Halloween this year was after she got home from trick-or-treating, she played with her cousins in her bedroom. The fun part was whenever the doorbell rang they would all come running down the hallway to answer the door to greet the trick-or-treaters. After a couple of times they developed a good system, when they reached the front door Ella would grab the candy bowl, Ethan would open the door, and Parker would grab as much candy as she could with both hands and literally shovel the candy into the trick-or-treater’s bags. It was quite entertaining to watch I must say although we had to put a stop to the quantity she was handing out.

Gotcha!

Later that evening I decided to have a little fun with PJ. I grabbed the first thing I saw from the dish drainer (to collect my treats), then quickly sneaked around the side door of our house and proceeded to knock on our front door in my impromptu Halloween costume.


With each year, Halloween just keeps getting better.

T.W.I.P. Notes (This Week In Parenting)

1) Parker has taken a keen interest in letters and the act of spelling her name. She can write her name however the sequence of the letters tends to be a bit erroneous (“Parekr”, “Pakrer”, or “Parkre”). Usually she brings it up when I’m wearing a shirt with writing on it. She also makes a point to verbally point out letters that are in my name as well as Georgia’s name. It's an interesting cerebral process she goes through. To witness it as a parent is divine.

2) Everybody was sick last week-Georgia, Parker, and Laura. Somehow I avoided the big mucus-laden mess. Luckily it wasn’t the flu, just head colds and congestion but it lasted all week.

3) CD number two of the Magnificent Fantastic’s new double cd “Sweet” is being finalized. This 48-song double cd will be our second (and final) effort. This project has taken about a year and a half to record with continual writing, recording, mixing, remixing, etc….ugh. I'm tired of it.



With that said this will be the final children’s music cd however, there is a new music project currently in development. The overall concept is to re-interpret the songs from the recent cd, “Sweet” into a homosexually-themed concept album. The name of the project will be “The Fagnificent Mantastic".

Now hear me out...

This quite original yet highly-controversial musical project will take the song titles from “Sweet” and re-interpret the lyrics to meet the project directive...a celebration of all things "gay". Song titles from the children’s cd will be used in both projects. These songs include “Pink Thongs”, “Spank Me”, “Mr. Fancy Pants”, “Play With Your Toys”, and “Tickle Here, Tickle There”.

Other project ideas that were bandied about yet determined to be too controversial were:

-A collection of songs celebrating the greatness of the Dahl family called “The Bragnificent Clantastic”. Songs include "Let's Cheat at Snarts", "The Toilet is Full of Crap and SO IS THE GARAGE!", and the country classic "The House Looks Empty With Just Three Cars Parked In Front of it".

-A grouping of musical numbers acknowledging older ladies with cleavage titled “The Sagnificent Cantastic”

-A jubilant celebration of the menses with the working title “The Ragnificent Madtastic”

Georgia the Daredevil

Ouch.

First Rainy Day of the Season

I love the rain! Rainy days are something to celebrate. We always have in my family.
When I was little my mom would always bake chocolate chip cookies on rainy days. We'd go for long walks in the rain, stepping on snails, racing toy boats down the gutters. One time, when the rain was really heavy, my best friend, Melissa, and I actually got our boogie boards out and tried to ride them down the "river" in the gutter. There is so much fun to be had on the few rainy days we get in Ventura.

When we woke up on Wednesday morning, first thing we did was open the front door and sat in the doorway and watched the rain. This was a first for Georgia (I'm sure she doesn't remember it from last year).

Parker went with Dad to get the paper.
After Georgia's nap I took the girls out for a walk in the rain and a search for good splashing puddles.

We didn't find many good puddles but we did come across a tetherball court.
It was so warm and humid! Some of the rain gear came off before we headed home.

Block Party!

The First Annual Hollings Street Block Party was held on October 3rd. The party went on from 2pm until 8 pm. I’d call it a success. Included in the extravaganza was:

-An intense and controversial game of Musical Chairs (featuring a live band…who pretty much sucked)
-One big jumper and a little jumper for the little ones
-A giant cookout which included a lot of food, even more food, and a couple snacks
-Neighbors getting to know each other a little better including an awful large number of overtly social, talkative women conversing with each other
-Two piñatas
-A visit from the local fire truck courtesy of the Ventura Fire Department
-A parade of decorated bicycles and tricycles
-A live band that had no idea what songs to play and pretty much sucked (it’s worth repeating)

Action photo...candy in flight. Parker doesn't stand a chance.

Judging from the picture...guess who won at Musical Chairs?

Members of our sucky band

Fan base of our sucky band

More members of our sucky band

Campout!...sorta

We staged a suburban campout last night at the driveway of our next door neighbor’s house. The kids had a great time and the parents as well. The campout included a hearty campfire, toasted chocolaty smores, an elegant abundance of alcohol (Laura drank too much), jubilant children, pleasant late evening weather, convenient location, and a soothing guitar duo providing background entertainment.

Storycorps

Any loyal NPR listener knows of storycorps. It began about six years ago in a storybooth in a terminal at NYC’s Grand Central Station. The main goal is to celebrate life through listening. The conversation/interview is usually between two people; a parent/child, husband/wife, or siblings. They usually talk about 3 minutes or so; it’s recorded, shared with the world, and stored at the Library of Congress.

After having numerous conversations with Parker I thought it would be funny if I could capture one of our recent conversations and record it for the project. The reason I find it funny is the context of the conversations on the show is usually some intense life experience shared between two people, such as a husband/wife that have been married for eighty years and relive their first date, or an immigrant telling his grandson about his journey to America, or a couple of friends sharing stories about crazy Uncle Al. So I thought it would be funny (in theory) if some of my recent conversations with Parker were recorded against the Storycorps backdrop.

1) I was lounging on the couch enjoying the incredibly fair and balanced Fox News (know thy enemy) when Parker comes and sits next to me. The report is showing footage and talking about the “amazing” number of protesters at their Tea Parties.

PJ: Are they having a tea party?
Me: Well, sorta yes.
PJ: That’s soooo fun, I love tea parties. Can we go?
Me: No we cannot.
PJ: But why?
Me: Because they were held several weeks ago
PJ: Oh
Me: Plus, it’s not the same type of tea party that you like to have.
PJ: {watching tv} Why are they so mad?
Me: {Sigh} that’s a long story Parker
PJ: Look at all the signs they made! They look Coolio! Daddy, can we make a sign for our tea party?
Me: Sure Parker.

2) Laying in bed with Parker at her bedtime.

PJ: Daddy, I love my mommy.
Me: Really, can you tell me why?
PJ: Well, she is always looking out for me, she lets me make my own sandwich, she takes me to pre-school every morning.
Me: Yeah…any thing else?
PJ: She brings such sweet joy to me.
Me: (chuckling) She brings you sweet joy?
PJ: Yeah, she brings me such sweet joy.

3) My mom brought Parker to my most recent baseball game at Ventura College. I came out of the dugout and joined Parker in the bleachers while my team was up to bat. A guy on my team with somewhat long blonde hair (lays a little past his shoulders) came up to home plate for his turn at bat.

PJ: Daddy, that’s a girl and girls don’t play baseball!
Me: Sure, they do. But that’s a boy Parker.
PJ: No it’s not – that’s a girl and girls don’t play baseball!
Me: There was a girl on my little league team that played baseball, although most girls play softball which is a lot like baseball.
PJ: Softball?
Me: Yes, softball.
PJ: Then why doesn’t that girl play softball?
Me: That’s a boy Parker. He just has long hair.
PJ: Oh.

Guitar For Sale (small child not included...yet)

Simply put…I have too many guitars.

I decided to take a proactive approach and advertise them on craigslist.

Normally Parker doesn’t like being in pictures. But of course when I don’t want her in the picture I can’t get rid of her. I politely ask her to remove herself from the picture and she playfully says ok, walks out of the shot, then right before I take the picture she rushes back in posing with panda bear and giggles…..

Too Big To Cuddle

“I really don’t need another kid but Dot says these are gettin’ too big to cuddle”-Raising Arizona

They grow and grow and grow. They’re no longer the wee little one you could share a tender parent/child bonding moment by rocking them to sleep or feeding them a bottle while they’re little round eyes stare at your incredibly large head and large face smiling back at them. Soon to be gone are those moments when you feed your child something to eat while you clean up the kitchen and you hear these strange sounds coming from her direction while your back is turned. You take a glance at her and see her face is bright red and she continues to make this weird sound, like she’s gasping for air. Panic! "Agghhh"…the large pot falls on the kitchen floor as you make a mad dash to your child to perform the Heimlich wishing someone else was here more qualified for the endeavor. You get to your child…examine her up close, stare at her a bit perplexed… and realize she’s just really constipated. That happened to me yesterday morning…ugh!!

But while that intense parent/child bond may be changing on a very basic and intimate level, there’s one very important new developmental stage that’s growing exponentially- the sibling relationship. They play together, they chase each other around the house, PJ continuously builds castles with her building blocks and “The Georgia Monster” promptly walks up and destroys them, Georgia will laughingly whack PJ on the head with some random item and although PJ doesn’t like it, she understands the situation (Georgia’s only 14 months old) and takes it rather well.

I like taking little mental snapshots of where we are with the two young ladies. Much like rehab its one day at a time. Just enjoy what you got with the understanding that these stages of parenting are moving quickly…at the speed of life.

I was doing a little web research on the term “too big to cuddle” and didn’t find much. What I did stumble across was this post from some anonymous person’s blog. This recent entry encapsulates the topic of parental joy and angst over child development in a very real and poetic manner. I really like how this is written........

Useta Be
Useta be…..we would cuddle in the lazy boy rocker with a blanket and a bottle and enjoy a few moments of quiet and calm for those last few moments of every day. I would steal a few glimpses at my favorite tv show and always be drawn back to your sleepy eyes and round little cheeks and oh so very sweet hands.

Useta be…..you would perch in the crook of my elbow, our temples pressed together at the side of our faces, the whispery soft feel of blood pumping to your brain carrying thoughts and wishes and dreams…..soulmates.

Useta be……(before the air bag deemed it unsafe) you would perch in your car seat next to me, clapping your hands and hooting and hollering along with the latest Disney Sing Along cd. ‘Davy Crockett’ and ‘Tiki Room’ singers had NOTHING on our mutually off key chorus. We made up with enthusiasm what we lacked in ability.

Useta be……we snuggled together in your bottom bunk to read aloud at night and you would protest mightily at my Kindy Teacher use of voices for all of the characters. My big bad wolf was just too dang scarey.

Useta be…..you liked the clothes I picked out for you to wear….well, most of the time anyway.

Useta be….. we would lace our fingers in the car, talk about things we saw at the side of the road, make up stories with your spelling words and share the things that went on in your world. We could solve any mystery…..any problem…..anything.

Useta be…….mine was the smile you looked for when you needed encouragement to try something new, pride when you accomplished a goal and comfort when things were not going so well.

Useta be……

Now, the teenager that you are, has lost the ability to speak in entire sentences, doesn’t crack a book unless its absolutely necessary, listens to music only you can hear through your ipod ear plugs, mumbles in response to even very basic questions, scowls disdainfully at outfits of my choosing and seems to smile only if there is something to be gained. Homework is yours and not to be shared. You rage when I ask you to pick up your socks and every chore is completed with a stomp and a growl. You don’t want to talk. You’re too big to cuddle. You’re too private to share.

“You are too involved in my LIFE!”

Just humor your Mom here, son.

I am missing the useta bes…….

Getting Parker To Sing

Me and PJ in the kitchen, 9/5/09 11 am…”Hey Parker, I have an idea, let’s go to the garage and play band. I’ll play sound engineer and you play the lead singer in our new band. And for every verse you sing into the microphone correctly I will give you some gummi bears. How does that sound?”

Parker’s reply is “no thanks”.

Laura talking to PJ in the garage, 9/6/09 6:45 pm…“Parker, quit running around the room. I want you to gather yourself, come here, and look me in the eyes. This is your last chance, either you sing this song or you go to bed. Which will it be??”

I’ve tried to get her to sing this song many times but to no avail. But finally, it took some persistence, dedication, and some ethically questionable tactics to get Parker to sing the song. Laura very effectively accomplished the goal of getting her to sing the entire song. Unfortunately it was not in the right key and she sang it at a different tempo but perhaps I can make it work.

It’s important that this song be sung by a little girl who bears an angelic voice along with an ability to insert a sense of desperation and feeling into the song. I couldn’t find that little girl so Parker will have to do…..

The lyrics are as follows:

(Verse)
It happens all day long, that’s why I sing this song
I can’t do it myself so I say this all day long

I can’t reach it myself, I need a little help
Like that little thing I want way up on the shelf

Goin’ number two – droppin’ a deuce
I’d wipe it myself but it seems there is no use

Mommy says to try, on her I must rely
I ask her everytime and I hear a breathy sigh

(Bridge)
Seven times a day, mommy leads the way
She’s a trooper, I’m a pooper...

Mommy wipes it all away

(Chorus)
Mommy?
Mommy
Mommy?
Will you wipe my butt?
Will you wipe my butt?

Happy Children

I have to say my number one goal as a parent is to raise happy children. And when I can see that Scott and I are succeeding it gives me the utmost joy and satisfaction. All the difficulties I encounter as a parent seem so worth it when I hear Parker say, "Mommy, I'm happy". She says this often and I ask her why she is happy. She usually thinks of something like, "...because I love my seasquirt", or ..."because you're the best mommy" or "...because I love sitting next to you when I eat lunch". I don't think these reasons are really the cause for her happiness at the moment. But rather she's just expressing a general sense of well being and loving life. This makes me happy.

Fun with Mud

Sarah and Jay have an empty patch of dirt where they removed a plant. It has proved to be an endless source of fun for Parker and Jack. When the dirt is dry they plant flowers in it. Their way of planting flowers is picking a flower then burying the stem. Then, tonight they watered it down and created a big mud puddle.


They planted a flower box which turned out to be quite pretty.